It has been a long hard journey but finally I learned that loving oneself is a must when seeking happiness, it is not selfishness. When I take care of myself, I am not abandoning others, I am filling up so when I am with them, I can be fully present and healthy. You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Can you honestly say that you love yourself? Or is it so easy to focus on your faults and insecurities instead of the things about yourself that you are happy with?
You may also be too busy focusing on others around you and not focusing on loving yourself. Some people don’t want to be alone and fear to do things on their own. Being in love with yourself provides you with self-confidence, self-worth and it will help you feel more positive. You stop comparing yourself with others and find yourself not worrying as much about what others think.
1. It’s always good to have some time for yourself, that is just for you to do something fun. In doing this you can learn to enjoy your own company, and most likely feel more CONFIDENT doing it on your own.
2. Reflecting on your mistakes helps you. If you can look back at some poor choices you may have made, and forgive yourself, you can start to move on and forget about the past. Loving yourself despite any mistakes you made in the past is great for your SELF-WORTH.
3. Try things out of your control, and say yes to things you would not normally say yes to. This will also help you with getting to KNOW YOURSELF. You will get to know your likes and dislikes. Try and get out of your COMFORT ZONE and see what happens.
4. Start a journal, write your thoughts and feelings. This is also a POSITIVE way for you to get rid of any negative experiences and feelings, helping you to focus on the good things and learn from the bad.
5. You can be hard on yourself sometimes, it’s natural, but you need to give yourself a break. NO ONE IS PERFECT, and you can’t expect yourself to be so.
6. Learn to say NO to others, set BOUNDARIES. Sometimes we do too much for people, we like to please other people, so we tend to stretch ourselves too thin and commit to everything we can, to the point of exhaustion.
7. Creating a list of what you have achieved is a great way to fall in LOVE with yourself. This makes you feel GOOD about yourself, whilst seeking happiness from what you have accomplished.
8. Learn to love your BODY the way it is. Size, scars, wrinkles, stretchmarks. ACCEPT them all and if there’s some things you can and WANT to change, do it just for yourself if it makes you happier.
9. DON’T live up to anybody’s expectations. Don’t change for anyone, just be yourself. Just be true to your OWN self. Don’t be afraid to step out of the crowd, just be YOU with your uniqueness.
10. REMIND yourself that you are beautiful, worthy of love, strong , intelligent, powerful and so on. Look in the mirror and smile at your reflection and say ‘I LOVE YOU.’
I have just shared my own journey to seeking happiness for those who need it most. I hope you take time to make yourself happy and learn to love yourself like you love so many people around you. I hope you figure out your heart and your mind. I hope you learn how to be kind to yourself, how to embrace the journey you are on. I hope you learn how to be proud of the person you are becoming, I hope you learn to be proud of where you are – even if it isn’t exactly where you want to be. I hope you learn to fall in love with the process, with the messiness of life and the confusion of it all. Love to all.
Do you have other tips on seeking happiness that you’d like to share with us? Contact us or email us at [email protected]
If you’re a woman and you’d like to join a lovely group of women who help uplift each other, check out the Facebook group Women for Women (Malta)
Antoinette is a survivor of child sexual abuse and domestic abuse. Alone she managed to raise four children and is keen to share her experiences about the struggles of having been a single mother.
She often talks about her difficult life openly in the hope of creating awareness of the unseen issues encountered by mothers doing everything alone on a tight budget, about domestic violence and other social issues.
