Through an anonymous post shared on the group Women for Women (Malta), a woman has shared her horrific experience of domestic violence with her narcissistic, and violent partner. The extent of her ordeal is clearly felt in her words: “I forgave my abuser because I was afraid he would kill me if I didn’t“.
Anita* understands that some may ask,” Why do some women first report their partners for allegedly abusing them, yet later drop the charges against them?”.
Anita tells us why she “forgave” her abuser. A year ago, Anita went through a traumatic experience with her partner, a narcissist. Lying, twisting and manipulating facts were his speciality. Trying to find an excuse to justify his physical violence towards her, in court he accused Anita of trying to run him over with a car. The real truth was that he was drunk and he beat Anita so hard that he fractured her nose.
“I Forgave My Abuser”… But Why?
He was a dangerous man with a history of domestic violence reports filed by other women. Anita had no choice but to forgive him and drop charges against him in court. She feared for her life. When outside in the streets, she would be extra vigilant, looking over her shoulder every few minutes incase he was stalking her. He terrified her.
Anita asks, if research shows that the best predictor of a man committing Domestic Violence is past perpetration of violence, why have we not yet established a perpetrator’s register? This tool could be used to inform magistrates and to inform persons who may get into relationships with the abuser, giving them a chance to analyse the risks and make informed decisions.
“Are magistrates aware of all the reasons behind why victims tend to forgive their abusers in court? Do they understand the complexities and realities of the lives of the victims? It is unacceptable that men keep repeating the same abuse over and over from one woman to another, and yet they keep being released.” These questions are asked by many women who have often written in to complain about the justice system and how it underserves the most vulnerable and at risk.
Domestic Violence Local Statistics
According to a local online news portal, a total of 9,682 domestic violence cases were reported to the police between 2010 and 2018, leading to 10,585 potential victims. An erratic increase in the number of cases was noted throughout the years. Of all reported cases, 8,160 women were reported as the ‘victims’. Alleged abuse ranged from “slight bodily harm with physical force” to “grevious bodily harm with physical force” as well as “stalking” and “psychological harm” (The Malta Independent Online, 2019).
As for statistics pertaining to official court cases in relation to alleged domestic violence, between 2015 and December 2018 there were 2,256 district court cases in the Maltese courts. Out of this total, 1,690 were listed as discontinued due to “merits of case being found exhausted”, 218 were liberated, 127 were found guilty and fined, 104 were time-barred and 10 were jailed. The remaining 107 court cases were either conditionally discharged, case was withdrawn, or were listed as having had “other outcomes” (The Malta Independent Online, 2019).
From the above statistics we can conclude that out of a total of 2,256 district court cases, only a mere 137 were found guilty and fined or given an effective jail term, amounting to just 6.07% of the total court cases in relation to domestic violence.
Do we even have to wonder why so many women suffer in silence and neither report nor start court cases? The justice system is clearly neither serving as a deterrent against Domestic Violence offenses, nor sufficiently protecting victims from repeat victimization.
The Istanbul convention enforces the proper standards by which the justice system should be handling cases of domestic violence. How many more women like Anita have to repeat the phrase “I forgave my abuser” before the State takes responsibility for the proper implementation of the Istanbul Convention?
A special thanks goes to Elaine and Francesca for their input within this article.
References
The Malta Independent Online. 2019. Assessed at https://www.independent.com.mt/articles/2019-04-02/local-news/1-341-reported-cases-of-domestic-violence-in-2018-6736206084 on 15th December 2020.
What is your opinion about the justice system in Malta in relation to domestic violence? Do you have an experience you’d like to share? Contact or email us at [email protected]
Claire Galea is a mum of three currently reading for a Degree in Nursing at the Faculty of Health Sciences, University of Malta, as a mature student. She is keen about holistic patient-centered care as well as public education about health-related subjects, which she frequently writes about on Wham as a Content Writer and Website Editor.
Claire is also passionate about spreading awareness on the negative effects that domestic abuse leaves on its victims’ mental, emotional, social and physical wellbeing. She is the author of two downloadable ebooks, namely Heal Your Life Forever and 5 Simple Steps To Creating The Life Of Your Dreams.
Click here to check out Claire’s full bio as well as a list of all her Wham published articles
